Just like Bread

I was waiting for Brandon to make some plans for the weekend. I really wanted to ask him to go camping which I hoped would open a door about our relationship. Instead after we went two rounds he called me an Uber. I really didn’t like the feeling it gave me. 

After I had come out of the bathroom, I noticed that he was in bed with the sheets pulled up to his waist and he was typing on his phone. Without looking up he told me that the driver would be there in 5 minutes so I should hurry and get down stairs.

I just stood there for a moment, looking at him. When he finally noticed that I wasn’t getting ready he looked up at me. “What’s wrong?” he asked.

I just looked at him and then looked away. “Just looking for my shoes,” I lied. I know I should have said something but I felt weird. No, I felt discarded and used, but I was still scared to come off as desperate. I knew he had to work in the morning so I wasn’t too upset that he wanted some sleep, but I thought he would tell me he would see me soon. I waited for him to ask me about the weekend or make some sort of plans, but nothing.

His phone went off indicating the driver was downstairs. He got out of bed and walked me to his door. Leaning down he kissed my forehead and then told me to have a good night. I so bad wanted to say something but I didn’t. Anyone who saw me standing in that hallway would have questioned if I was on drugs. My hair was a mess, my shoes were in my hand and I was staring at his closed door like I was lost. I finally stumbled my way into the elevator and made my way home.

I woke up Friday feeling like shit. Not just from the alcohol I’d consumed, but that wasn’t helping either. I wanted to talk to someone so badly but I already knew the girls weren’t a huge fan of me being with Brandon. My friends at work weren’t much help because I never told anyone I had seen Brandon again since the first night, plus they were pro-Liam. I couldn’t exactly call my mom up and talk to her about the guy I was hooking up with. My brother may have been a possibility once in my life but not now. We never used to have any trouble talking about sex and relationships. In fact he tried to get me into a relationship with one of his best friends Landon. We were actually talking about making plans to go out when suddenly my brother freaked out and wouldn’t let us near each other. I guess he finally realized that if this went anywhere, his friend would be shagging his sister and he couldn’t handle that thought.

Going to the gym seemed to be my best option. I could work off some aggression and get out of my own head. Besides, my body was finally in the best shape it had ever been and I wanted to keep it that way. Working the hours I had planned this summer meant I wouldn’t always have free time to work out and I needed to get it in while I could.

After the gym, I ran a few errands – picking up a few groceries, dropping off a few things I needed mailed and then grabbed a salad to take home from lunch. I had purposely left my phone at home so I didn’t check it obsessively. I dropped all my stuff on the kitchen counter, then looked at my screen. One new message. I smiled and opened it, waiting to see what Brandon said. Only it wasn’t Brandon. It was Carla from work, asking if I could work longer tonight as she wanted to get off early. I sighed, typed in that I would and sat down to watch tv as I ate my food. 

I watched a few random daytime tv shows, had a shower and did my hair and make up and still no word from him. As I was getting ready to head off for work I quickly typed:

Alya: Miss you J Hope you are having a good Friday!

I know it’s sad but part of me just hoped he forgot we didn’t have plans. I figured it didn’t hurt to mention it was Friday.

Work was crazy busy but it kept me distracted. A few people had recently quit – people who were now done school and went home for the summer or those who moved on to better jobs. Plus there seemed to be an endless amount of things going wrong all night. One of the cash machines wouldn’t work, the nozzle for the draft beer kept getting stuck, we ran out of wings…the list just went on and on. 

When we finally closed for the night, we all just collapsed into the booths. We still had to restock and clean but no one had the energy. After a few drinks, some people started looking like they were going to fall asleep. Finally the night manager Jared made us all get up to finish our work. We all moaned but started moving. 

Liam stopped in front of the table I was sitting at and offered his hand to help pull me up. He slung his arm across my shoulders and walked with me to the bar.

“All my close duties are done,” he told me. “While you slackers were resting, I filed my incident reports, handed in my counts and clean up already. I will help you close down.” He had worked the door that night and the doormen's closing responsibilities were a lot less than anyone else’s. No one complained though – their job could get a lot more physical through the night and we knew they always had our backs if anyone caused trouble.

At that moment, with his arm around me, it would have taken nothing to lay my head on his shoulder and cuddle into him. It was soooo tempting but it also confused me. Why was this making me feel filled with anticipation. Anticipation for what? It was Brandon I wanted. Besides, this place is a rumour mill. If his arm stayed around me any longer, people would start to talk.

I ducked from under his arm with the guise of bending down to pick up the tray we used to stack the glasses and then send them through the dishwasher. I started gathering all the stuff that needed to be washed and tidying up the bar area. Liam looked at me for a moment then shrugged. He took a quick count of what needed to be refilled and then went off to gather what needed restocking.

We worked in silence until we were just about done. I told him I could take it from there and thanked him for helping me.

“No problem Alya.” He smiled. Then he stopped and turned towards me. “You know, I do like you but I won’t push myself on you. Either way I hope we can at least be friends. I hope I haven’t done anything to offend you.” He was looking at me questioningly, with his head slightly tilted to the side studying me. I suppose a guy like him didn’t get turned down often.

“No!! Not at all!” I exclaimed. “I think you are ho—wholesome, and umm nice and stuff!” Good grief Alya, nice recovery! Wholesome??? I couldn’t think of any other word to replace hot which was about to fall out of my mouth.

Liam scrunched up his face a bit and laughed. “Wholesome? Can’t say I’ve been described that way before. It sounds like how you describe a loaf of bread. Does this mean you think I’m squishy and crusty?”

I looked up at his smiling face and then down to his ripped body and blushed. 

“Umm no, no not at all,” I stuttered. “You are just a really nice guy and any girl would be lucky to have you.”

He just looked at me like he expected me to say more. Finally he winked at me, gave me one last smouldering look and said, “Well, then I guess I need to find that lucky lady!” He grabbed his stuff and said his goodbyes to everyone as he left.

Part of me wanted to follow him and tell him that I wanted to be that lucky lady. That one more look like that, and I would do whatever he wanted me too. But then I looked down and saw my phone and remembered Brandon.

Brandon. The one who never replied back to my miss you text. The one who dismissed me last night. The one who also arouses me like no other and makes me forget how to breathe. The one who I wanted to be with right now, but who apparently didn’t need to be with me.

I sighed, clocked out and made my way home. To my own bed. Alone.

Pepperoni for All

Turns out, there was no firing squad waiting for me when I got in. Tara and Chelsea were sitting in the living room watching a movie. I saw Tara raise her eyebrow as I came in, but Chelsea gave her a slight shake of the head and nothing was said.

I went and had a quick shower while they finished the movie and then joined them in the living room. We started talking about some plans we wanted to do for the summer. We all know after this summer is over, things will be changing for us. By next year we should all be out being adults with big girl jobs, fingers crossed. No more lazy summer days or extended holidays.

“Why don’t we go camping?” Chelsea offered up. “We can get a big group together and put up big group tents. Co-ed sleep overs are always much more fun!”

“If we are having one last blow out, I want it somewhere that I can actually get a blow out!” Tara countered. “Somewhere like Vegas!!”

They began a friendly banter, pointing out the positives of their trip and the negatives of the opposite one. I wasn’t sure what one I really preferred. I actually do like camping, especially when you get the right group together.  It’s always a good time cooking meals, drinking, and sitting around the campfire telling stories.

On the other hand, - I LOVE Vegas. It’s always such a fun time and with so much to do it doesn’t matter if people bail. Vegas can fit everyone’s budget and there there is no way we will ever get bored or rained out. Tough call.

“What about both?” I suggested. “We can go camping soon because it’s not as hard to organise. Then maybe right at the end of summer, we hit Vegas for a few days. One last hurrah before it’s back to school?”

The girls pondered this idea and then nodded in agreement. We thought about it for a while, and played with some dates until we had some tentative plans. I couldn’t wait. I loved to travel and even though these  weren’t exactly exotic trips, it would be with people I loved and I knew it would be a blast.

“So who are we inviting?” I asked. I made it seem like it was just a casual question but really I wanted to know if there was going to be an issue inviting Brandon. This was my chance to get a better idea on where we stood.

They started naming some people like Ryan, Tara’s cousin and his best friend James, a few girls we still were in touch with from high school, and then some people from Chester’s. The list was getting bigger and bigger, so we finally decided to just make a facebook group and make it an open invitation. I figured since this was open to all, there was no reason I couldn’t ask Brandon.

Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday I worked the open shift. It sucked getting up early but the bar was a lot less busy and they wanted to ease me in more. We never be worked alone but they still needed to know I could handle the crowds; the big group orders and as well still keep an eye on the customers.

By now everyone knew that Liam had asked me out and that I had also turned him down. It was great working in a place where we were all friends but the downside was that there was no hiding anything, especially anything juicy. The girls thought I was absolutely crazy to say no and to be honest I wasn’t sure that I didn’t agree. Every time I saw Liam I couldn’t help but admire him from afar. We weren’t avoiding each other or anything, but our shifts didn’t match up or he would be working in another position aside from the bar which he did from time to time to build up his hours. Perhaps I was stupid for not giving Liam a chance but I had never experienced what I was feeling with Brandon. It was exciting and I loved the thrill of being with him.

Speaking of Brandon we had been doing our normal texting all week. I really wanted to ask him about coming camping but I wanted to do it in person so I could gauge his reaction. I was hoping he was going to ask me to do something this week but so far we had no plans. I knew I could ask him but I still felt a little timid and didn’t want to come off as clingy. Why is it we girls always need to second guess every move we make?

By the time Thursday came around the girls were demanding  I come out with them. I was really hoping to have plans with Brandon but since he didn’t ask, I couldn’t keep putting off the girls with no reason. I didn’t want to tell them I was waiting for him because I hate the thought of being that girl. Both Tara and Chelsea were eager to go out though and wouldn’t let me wait by my phone. Neither one of them was dating anyone at the moment, but I think both were hoping for a little summer romance. 

I really didn’t want to put much effort into getting ready but Chelsea made me put on a skater dress I had recently ordered online.  It definitely added sex appeal from the loose tank top and shorts I had wanted to wear, along with flat sandals.

Have you ever had one of those nights where you didn’t plan on being out, and didn’t think it would be a good time but in the end it’s one of the best nights ever? That’s how the night turned out,  I guess it’s because there are no expectations. As soon as we got there, we went to the bar to get a drink. Just as the bartender placed the drinks in front of us the DJ started playing a fantastic old school mix so of course we had to hit the dance floor. I didn’t want to have a good time but they just kept playing the most amazing blast-from-the-past songs that we could barely leave the dance floor. We were singing along acting like fools, trying to remember all the dance steps. 

Of course, with all that dancing we were getting pretty thirsty so the drinks started flowing. By the end of the night I couldn’t even tell you how many we had, or even how many we had bought for us. Tara was flirting pretty heavily with some guy who introduced himself as Anthony and who insisted on buying us drinks all night. I tried to decline but she seemed into him and he truly didn’t seem to mind, even laughing at me when I did try to pay.

Chelsea and I finally took a break and headed to the bathroom. By this time we were not quite steady on our feet and  there was only a half hour left before the bar closed. We decided we were at the point we needed food and we wanted to head out before the crowd so we didn’t have to wait for a slice of pizza. We found Tara and asked if she was coming with us. She didn’t look happy to leave but Anthony slipped her his number and kissed her before we left so all was not lost.

We helped each other walk to the Big Slice, and groaned when we saw all the tables were full and there was a little line. We debated just leaving but we all knew we needed some food or tomorrow would be a horrible day. Suddenly Chelsea’s eyes widened as she looked over my shoulder. I turned around to see what she was looking at and landed right in Brandon’s arms. He chuckled as I stumbled, then stumbled himself as I flung myself into his arms. He looked so damn sexy in his white dress shirt with his dark hair. 

“What are you doing here sexy? “ I slurred. 

“I’m just on the hunt for drunken damsels in distress.” Brandon grinned. “And you three look like you fit that description.”

We tried to deny it but even my best acting skills couldn’t hide the fact we were far from sober. It didn’t help when Tara asked a table beside us if she could sit with them because her feet hurt.

“My buddies  and I have a table – would you ladies like to join us? We were just about to grab some slices ourselves.” He led us over to a table and introduced his friends, John and Clarke. Chelsea and Tara slid in on side beside John. 

Rather than joining the table Brandon reached for my hand and offered to go get pizza for everyone. Have you ever had a table of drunken people screaming at you for what toppings they wanted? Not fun. Finally Brandon told them it was “Pepperoni for all!!” as we walked away. Only rather than heading for the line-up, he pointed us down a short hallway with a bunch of doors, that I assume led the kitchen and bathrooms. He suddenly pulled me through a doorway and into a little alley and took me into his arms.

The surprise of the moment caught me off guard and within seconds he had me pushed up against the wall. We were all over each other, kissing and groping like a bunch of teenagers. We accidentally bumped into some garbage cans making a lid fall off and crash. Even in my inebriated state I remembered where we were.

“Aren’t they going to wonder where we are?” I asked him as I played with the buttons on his shirt.

He started nipping at my neck, and grinding into me. He mumbled something about our friends thinking we were in the line-up and the sensation of his breath in my ear near pushed me over the edge.

He stared heavily at my chest and used his fingers to trace over the lines criss crossing across my cleavage. His hands then made their way down my sides until they reached the hem of my dress. Using one hand he undid his zipper and pulled his cock out. Still holding it with one hand he used the other to slightly lift my dress up and started rubbing against me. I know we were in some dirty alley, and I know my friends were right inside, but it felt so good and I didn't care.

Reaching down with his free hand he pushed my panties aside, and began inserting first one, then two fingers inside me. I was becoming louder, starting to moan and cry out , so he silenced me with another searing kiss. I felt like I was seeing stars.

Slowly my brain came into focus that he was pulling away from me. There was no way I wanted to stop and was ready to do anything he wanted. That's when I realised that he didn't have any protection on and there was no way we were continuing without it. 

"God damn it!" he growled and smacked his hand on the brick wall. I felt so disappointed and unsatisfied. Then I looked at him, smiled and licked my lips. 

"There are other ways you know..." I said seductively. I squatted down, thankful for once that I was wearing heels which would help keep me higher off the ground. I tentatively licked his shaft and then felt him shudder.He pushed himself into my mouth and began running his fingers through my hair. That was all it took. Back there in that nasty, dark alley I gave him a blow job that he would remember all his life. Well at least I would remember it for sure. It was so sexy and forbidden that it just made it that much better.

After when we both were able to stand, he leaned in and kissed my forehead. Wrapping his arm around my waist he lead us back inside. While I was left hanging, I knew we had to get back to our friends and in my drunk state I wasn't sure if 5 minutes had passed or 30. Luckily we were able to get back inside just  as there was no line at the counter. They were pulling out a full pizza ready to be sliced. 

Brandon pulled out a $50, passed it to the cashier and asked them to box the whole pie. We walked back over to the table where Clarke was telling a story and cracking everyone up...Well Chelsea and John at least...Tara looked like she was half passed out.

He placed the box on the table, grabbed us each a slice and told everyone to have a good night. We ran outside and hailed a taxi. Safe to say it wasn't long before we were back at his house and now it was my turn. I guess I am glad I went out after all.

 

Making My Own Choices

“You told him no??!?” Tara screamed in disbelief. 

It was Sunday morning and the girls and I were having brunch. This was the first time we had all really been able to get together since I left the bar with Brandon the first night. We all had so much to catch up on. I had told them all the juicy details of my dates with Brandon so far. Normally I am a pretty private person about sex, but then again I never usually had anything exciting to talk about.

I had just told the girls about turning Liam down and they were not very happy with me to say the least. I think Tara’s outburst caused at least half the tables near us to turn and stare.

“Could you be any louder?” I hissed under my breath. I know I don’t really need to defend myself or my actions to anyone, well unless I was asking for their help and advice, which I was. “Well, I like Brandon,” I started. “I just don’t want him to think I don’t if he see me out some night with someone else.”

Tara and Chelsea looked at each other, and then back at me.

“Alya, you have been on two dates with this guy. I think you are getting way ahead of yourself.” Chelsea stated. “I mean, do you guys even know much about each other or has everything just been about sex?”

“I don’t understand,” I commented back. “I thought you guys were all for me finding someone new and moving on. Isn’t that what I am doing?” I grabbed the vodka and orange juice I was drinking – don’t judge, at least there was orange juice, and took a long drink.

“We wanted you to look for a rebound or a distraction. Not to boink some guy and then latch on to him, even if he is hot!” exclaimed Tara, with her usual grace and sensitivity. “Liam is a total catch though so perfect for you. Take it slow and get to know him and maybe don’t get under this one quite so fast.”

Tears started to well up in my eyes. All these dating do’s and don’ts were just too complicated for me. If I like someone, then I  shouldn’t sleep with him, because he will just use me. But it’s ok to use another guy, and sleep with him just to get over someone else. Perhaps there was a reason I stayed in a shitty relationship for so long.

“I think what Tara meant Al, was that you are moving pretty fast with Brandon. I know we said we were going out to get you some action that night but to be honest that was just a figure of speech. I’ve never seen you jump into something with someone so fast and usually those don’t turn into relationships.” Chelsea tried to explain.

I was getting more frustrated the more the conversation went on. “You guys are the ones who said to find someone new! That’s what I did and now you think I’m some slut” Just like Peter said, I thought to myself. I took another long drink of the vodka and oj and looked for the waitress to order another.

“Alya,” Chelsea said as she wrapped her arm around me, “I would never call you a slut. You are one of my best friends and I know you inside out. All we want is for you to be happy.” She looked at Tara for confirmation, and after Tara nodded, Chelsea continued. “Just go a little slower. Explore what’s out there and decided what it is that you want. Don’t jump into something new just because he’s there.”

I nodded my head to indicate that I understood and agreed and changed the subject. As they discussed who was at the bar on Friday night and what went on, I couldn’t help but let me mind wander. Normally I trusted my friends but this time I thought they were wrong. Being with Brandon was amazing and how he made me feel so different than anything I ever had with anyone else. Not that there had been may others – just Peter and one boyfriend in high school.

Maybe it was wrong but I liked the way Brandon seemed to be so in control and how he knew the right ways to excite me. I was never really into that Fifty Shades of Grey stuff but now that I had been with someone who took the lead I was beginning to see the benefits. I think for once I was going to make a decision on my own and take a chance on where this was going, rather than dating around. Besides the thought of needing to download Tinder scared me!

……………………………………………………………………..

The next week flew by. I finally finished everything I needed to do for my law clerk program so I was now off for the summer. Brandon had to work all week so I didn’t get to see him. He told me he was super busy with some projects that he was working on and wouldn’t be able to text much. Still I was disappointed when I barely heard from him all week. Maybe the girls were right.

I was feeling low and pouting on Friday night, so I decided to have a shower and then go to sleep.  I was just getting into bed when I had a text from Brandon:

Brandon: So I am laying here in bed and I’m pretty lonely. Care to keep me company?

Alya: I’m pretty sure you could fill that space with your choice of girls if you really wanted to. Or perhaps you wouldn’t have to be so lonely if you had texted me all week

Brandon: Sorry sweetheart. Its been a busy week but I was thinking of you. Mostly thinking of all the things I could be doing to you if I wasn’t stuck at work.

Alya: oh…Well I am in bed so maybe share some of those ideas with me so I can tell you if they are good ideas or not

Brandon: You are in bed? Oh god. Now I am picturing you spread out like you were on my bed that first night, looking over your shoulder at me.

Alya: You liked that?

Brandon: I think like is an understatement. Nearly all my fantasies now start with you giving me that come fuck me look.

Alya:……….

Brandon: Hello?

Brandon: Alya are you still there?

Brandon: Don’t leave me hanging like this…

Alya: Sorry…I was just packing a bag. I’ll be there soon.

As soon as I hit send, I finished cramming stuff in my overnight bag. I slipped into the first cute underwear  set I could find, covered it with a sundress and some flip flops. I grabbed my phone, turned out the lights and headed out the door.

Brandon and I spent most of the rest of the weekend in bed, only getting out to order take away or shower, although Brandon did use his phone from time to time, I assume to check in with work stuff. Sunday he finally made us get dressed and we went to a diner he knew where we ordered the most amazing burgers ever, along with fries, onion rings and mozza sticks. Horrible junk food but after the massive work out I had, I wasn’t too worried about the calories.

He finally dropped me off at my house around 9:30. As he was kissing me goodbye he told me we would make plans to hang out again later in the week. I wanted to ask him right then what this was but I couldn’t. He’s so much older than me and I didn’t want to come off like some little girl sending him a note saying “Will you be my boyfriend, check yes or no”.  I decided to just hope he felt the same way and wait to hear from him.

I kissed him once more, and thanked him for good weekend. As I slipped out of his car, he checked out my ass and grinned. “Perhaps I should be the one thanking you!” I groaned. He was so cheesy and his lines were horrible, but I can’t lie. It made me smile and gave me hope. I turned and headed into the apartment, ready for the bitch session that was coming for being MIA all weekend.

 

I'm Not Easy With Being Sleazy

I decided not to stay at Brandon's after our date and headed home, even though I would have loved nothing more than to continue our night. However I had to work at 4 pm tomorrow and I was working until close. It was going to be a long night but Saturdays were always busy so I hoped that meant a lot of money in my pocket.

On my way to work though, I had to stop at the mall and pick up a new romper for Tara. I just hated that I was using my money to pay for it. That's right - I didn't take the money Brandon put on my clutch. It left a really bad feeling in my mouth, almost like he was paying me for sex even though I think - hoped? he was just being generous and felt bad about ruining the outfit. Before I left his house last night, I placed the bills under a glass in his kitchen. I gasped when I saw how much it was. He had given me $500. Who even just randomly carries that amount of cash around these days? It's not that it was a huge obscene amount but most people just use credit or debit cards now.

As I came out of my room ready to hit the shops, I noticed a huge bouquet of flowers on the side table. Beside it was a note from Chelsea saying these had come while I was in the shower. She was headed out to study with some friends for the afternoon but she demanded to know what it was I did last night to deserve such an amazing gesture. She gave me a few hints as to what she thought I did to earn them with some kinky pictures she doodled on the note.

I stopped to smell the flowers and then bent down to look for the card. I found it and opened it up to see:

You may not have accepted my small token last night, but I hope you will will accept these. As beautiful as they will be, I'm sure they won't be as stunning as you.

As I was already starting to run late, I didn't have time to admire them. I couldn't help but feel a little weird though. I'm not really used to a guy spending money on me so I wouldn't know how to react anyways, but I still felt really uneasy over the money. I tried to just push it from my mind. Really was it any different than if he spilt a glass of wine all over me and offered to replace it since he ruined it? I knew there was a difference but I didn't want to think about that.

.............................................

Work was going by fairly quickly that night which was great. What was even better was that at 7pm, Grant the manager who was training me left and Liam took over. As always he looked so good and all I wanted to do was stare at him. For once though I was determined not to look like an idiot in front of him.

"Hey Alya!" he smiled. "Looks like its you and me again kid!" I couldn't even be mad at the kid part because he said it in some crazy attempt at an accent, and failed miserably. For once it was his turn to go red.

He let me take over the bar for a while, only stepping in when I was unsure of something. By 10 pm though it had become pretty full and we were both quite busy. We worked in sync with each other and I was proud of myself for not losing my cool when his arm would reach around me to grab something or when he put his hand on the small of my back when he was explaining to me how to ring in a special drink order. We continued to flirt casually all night and I was having a blast. I didn't want the night to be over. Well I did...by now it was 2 am and I had been on my feet for 10 hours. Sadly when you close up you still need to restock everything, clean up, do the cash and whatever else needs to be done.

Finally around 3:30 am we collapsed into a booth with a few other co-workers who were left. We tended to try to wind down with a drink or two before we left and tonight was no exception. While Liam and our bouncers Stephen and Gary talked about some of the baseball games that had been played today, I mostly chatted to Serena and Kelsey, two of the girls who worked the floor tonight. I could hold my own when talking about sports but sometimes I enjoy girly gossip too.

Things were going fairly smooth and light until, suddenly Gary tuned to me and if I was planning on going to the next gaming convention to see the "show". He asked it with a smirk and an exaggeration on the word show so of course everyone wanted to know what he was getting at. Gary quickly relayed the story of Peter's romance and he had everyone in stitches. He was adding in details I hadn't even heard about, although knowing Gary the story was likely embellished some.

When Liam finally stopped laughing he turned his body towards me and asked, "So Alya, when are you going to stop dating losers like that and date a real man?" He looked at me with raised eyebrows and a smile. Stephen and Gary started hooting and hollering and egging him on, while the girls shot daggers at me with their eyes. It was no secret everyone wanted to be the one Liam asked out. So far since he had been working with his, he hadn't paid attention to anyone. Some of the pettier girls who had struck out had even tried to convince us that he was gay just because they couldn't seem to sink their claws in him.

I was just about to say that I was dating a real man now, when I realised that I wasn't sure what Brandon and I were doing. We had only been on two dates and never spoke of anything. While I really did like Brandon I couldn't deny the attraction to Liam. Besides after the last two times with Brandon I finally figured out just how much I had been missing out on. Maybe it was time to learn just how much being single could be. Uhhh perhaps just with a little less sex. I didn't need a reputation of being a sleazy whore.

Before I could question if he was asking me out I paused. Being the person that I am, I felt uncomfortable dating two guys at once. I know I'm lame. Maybe if I wasn't sleeping with Brandon it would be different. I knew I couldn' pull it off.

It suddenly hit me that I hadn't said anything and Kelsey was kicking me under the table, and not even being subtle about it. I coyly looked at Brandon and exclaimed, "Well I'm not sure if you are even asking me out or not but I don't date people I work with (lies!!!!!). Besides I doubt you can you even handle me" As I said that I went to flick my hair over my shoulder in an exaggerated way as a joke but I totally missed and knocked my glass over and spilt my drink everywhere. I thought everyone was going to die laughing (and me from embarrassment). Gary and Stephen were actually leaning against each other, red from laughing so hard.

"Alya", Liam said shaking his head as he wiped up the mess, "I think I would need to be brave to date you. In fact I think anything we get up to would be dangerously--ly entertaining. I get the no co-workers policy but I am hoping I can change your mind." I blushed, ducked my head and wondered just what I gave up by turning him down. Good, ok - great, sex was messing with my mind.

Everyone's A Tease

The rest of the week passed quickly. I spent Thursday night with my favourite little man, my nephew Gabe. He’s only two and luckily for me, he hasn’t reached the terrible stage yet, at least not with me anyways. He spent the night following me around asking me a million questions and calling me “Ya-ya” since he can’t seem to master Alya yet. I wish all males were as cute and easy to handle.

Speaking of handfuls, I thought of my night ahead. Other than knowing we were getting drinks I wasn’t exactly sure where we were going or what kind of style to go with. Luckily Tara came to my rescue and lent me a romper she had purchased a few weeks ago at Bebe . I wasn’t sure if it was too revealing or sexy for where we were going so I added a bright pink blazer, some strappy heels and a clutch. Chelsea helped me with my make up – after all her jobs modelling she picked up some great techniques where I was helpless. I vowed to spend some more time watching tutorials on Youtube.

I was wreck waiting for Brandon to come pick me up. The other night was such a weird night, so technically this was our first date. Trying to decide if I was going to let him kiss me was a bit of overkill considering the amount of time we already spent together naked. I knew I owed him absolutely nothing and I was still in control over what was going to happen tonight, but it was going to be tough to play the innocent virgin after the other night.

Tara and Chelsea had both left already, deciding to hit a local pub. Tara declared she wasn’t “staying home like some old maid while you are out running around town with a sugar daddy .” Her words, not mine.

When 9 o’clock came, I was pacing figuring he wasn’t coming. At 9:02 I was irritated that he was late (a whole two minutes) and by 9:03 I was getting ready to change into sweats and turn on Netflix. Suddenly I heard a knock at the door and I scolded myself for being so emotional and dramatic.

I took a moment to compose myself, and try not to seem so eager and then went to open the door. My stomach felt like it was on an elevator that just dropped 10 floors. Brandon was standing in front of me wearing a pair of dark fitted pants with a light button up top with the sleeves pushed up. Usually nothing looks better than a man in a suit but at the moment I’m not sure anything would have made him look hotter. His hair was in the casual messy disarray they guys favour and all I could think of was how much more messy I wanted to make it.

Brandon smiled at me and leaned in to kiss my cheek. “Hi Beautiful” he said. “You look amazing!”

I grinned, blushed and did this half twirl. Why do I feel the need to keep embarrassing myself with this guy I wondered?

“Just let me grab my clutch and I’m ready to go” I replied, turning my head, hopefully quick enough that he didn’t see my pink cheeks. He led me out to his car – don’t ask me what kind. I’m completely useless with cars. All I know was his was newer and looked expensive.

Trying to fill in the awkward moments – mine not his, he seemed completely at ease, I asked him where we were going.

“I thought we could head over to Little Italy,” he informed me. “There is some weekend festival going on with music and other live entertainment. The roads are closed so most restaurants have their tables out in the street. It can get pretty crowded but it’s usually a great time. Are you up for that?”

“Sounds good to me!” I responded. Literally anything with him sounded good to me. If we had to cuddle up a bit or hold hands so we didn’t get lost in the crowd, even better. We parked the car a few streets over and walked to where the festival began.

It was so pretty. There were strings of lights hung across the streets and in all the trees, lighting the area but not making it too loud. Brandon was right when he said it was crowded, but luckily everyone was in a good mood so it made for a great atmosphere. We wandered down the streets and took everything in. Everywhere we looked there was booths selling traditional Italian foods and trinkets, music as coming out of speakers that seemed to be hidden and every restaurant had tables set up with hostesses trying to lure people to sit down. It almost felt like I was back in Rome – my parents had taken me for my 16^th birthday and I had loved it.

As we continued to walk around I couldn’t help but notice the stares Brandon got from other women. Normally I would be a bit intimidated but he seemed oblivious to all. Both men and women seemed to react to him in the same way – as if knowing he was someone in control and someone they had to please. Again Brandon didn’t even seem to notice. I guess he was used to having a commanding presence and having people do as he asked. It was so sexy to me. Guys my age don't have this kind of presence.

“Why don’t we find a place to have some drinks and some snacks?” Brandon asked me. Seeing as I have a love affair with all food, I readily agreed. He took my hand and we started seeking out a place to go to. The problem was everything looked good everywhere.

“How about if we just buy a blanket, sit here in the middle and get the best things brought to us? “ I joked.

“I’m sure that can be arranged” Brandon laughed. Only I think if he thought I was even slightly serious he would have attempted it.

We realised that all the restaurants were filling up so we agreed to choose the next one we saw with an open table.  Thankfully, as we were walking by a place a couple was getting up to leave so we were able to take their table. A waiter filled us in on their special for the festival – platters with  cheese, charcuterie, bread and wine. That sounded perfect so we placed our order. We spent the next hour and a half people watching, talking and honestly eating some of the freshest food I ever had.

I was starting to get a bit on edge though. Aside from when he held my hand as we walked around looking for somewhere to eat, there had been no touching, no innuendo (which our texts were full of) and no moves on his behalf. As for me – well I tried, at least in my mind. I would briefly touch his arm when telling a story, look at him from under my eyelashes, and even went as far as running my finger around my lips to see if he flinched. Nothing.  I sighed (well to myself).

When he asked for the bill, I accepted that he wasn’t attracted to me and the night was ending. As we walked away from the restaurant, I went to turn to my left to head back towards his car. He placed his hand on the small of my back and started turning to the right. “I thought we would go to this cosy little cocktail bar I know”, he looked down at me in question. “Unless that is, you wanted to go home?”

I tried to hide my smile as I looked at him and said “lead the way!” 

We walked for just a few minutes and then he stopped at a pretty unassuming door. I looked at the sign on the door that read "Blue Orchid". When we stepped inside there was the low sound of jazz playing and it was quite dark, but some random areas were lit with neon blue lights. It seemed almost smokey but I didn't smell anything so perhaps there was a fog machine or some dry ice?  Brandon spoke to a man who came over to assist us. I saw them briefly shake hands and then we were being led to a table in a dark corner. I guess money must have been exchanged because the man was eager to tell us there was nothing that was too much trouble.

It was so dark where we were sitting that we couldn't read the menu. Brandon picked up and candle and leaned in close to me, hold it near the list of drinks so we could see. Having him so close was making me dizzy. I scanned the menu and ordered a Cherry Punch -made with black cherry vodka, cointreau, honey, pineapple juice and mint. As the waitress took our order Brandon placed his hand on my leg, slowly using his thumb to massage circles in my skin.

"So how long were you planning on teasing me earlier, Alya?" I froze and gulped and looked in his eyes.

"Oh I knew what you were doing the whole time...I just thought I would let you keep going." he stated. "Do you know why I let you keep going?"

"N-no" I stuttered.

A wicked smile came over his face. "Because now it's my turn to have fun." He slid his hand up into my hair and tilted my face towards his. He knew I wanted his kiss but I wasn't about to get what I wanted - yet. He nibbled on my ears and kissed my neck, then along my jaw line. When he finally gave in and placed his lips on mine, I lost all control. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him in closer. I tried to tease him with my tongue but he seemed to always be one step ahead of me. I have no idea how long we continued. Someone's loud laughter broke our embrace and I shivered. I bit my lip and took a deep breath trying to stop my racing heart. I noticed that our drinks had been delivered and we hadn't even noticed. I reached for my glass and took a huge drink.

Brandon grabbed his beer and leaned back looking at me with a cocky grin. How is it that guys never seem to get embarrassed? I began to discretely straighten out my clothes. A lot easier said then done when its so damp between your legs. I tried to act casual and glance around the room to see if anyone was looking at us. I suddenly realised that each table was set in darkness and that the neon lights attracted your attention else where, giving each space some privacy. Well as much privacy as darkness allowed.

Taking my glass and tilting it sideways, Brandon slipped his fingers into my drink and grabbed an ice cube. He brought it to his lips and sucked the excess juice away and then slowly started tracing it down my leg, then he brought his hand up under the blazer and ran it all over my back. If I thought I was wet before, I was soaked now, and not from the ice cube.

After continuing to torment me, I finally managed to beg and plead enough with Brandon, to get us out of that bar.We never spoke all the way to his car. He just kept his arm around me and guided me through the crowd at a rapid pace. Once in the car, he turned the volume up on some song that was pumping through the radio. The mix of the bass, the darkness and the silent tension was beyond erotic.

I don't even remember getting to his condo, parking or riding the elevator. As soon as his door was unlocked, he was pushing us inside and tearing off my clothes.

"Not mine!" I gasped as he was yanking at Tara's romper. He seemed to understand and tried to find a way to get it off me in a hurry. Finally he grabbed his wallet and pulled out a few bills and placed them on top of my purse. "Buy her a new one" he rasped, ripping the straps away from the suit. "In fact buy her three more. And add in some new underwear for yourself". With that he tore at the little strings that was holding  my panties together.Shoving it all to the floor he picked me up and carried me over to the arm of the sofa. Stepping between my legs, he used his own powerful thighs to spread mine and thrust into me.

Hours later as I laid across his bed totally spent, I started dreaming up new ways to tease him if this was going to be how it turned out!

Maybe The Grass Is Greener

The first part of the week went fairly quickly for me with school as my year was ending and there were just a few assignments and loose ends I needed to tie up. I remember how for the few years after high school I didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life. It seemed like everyone else around me had all these plans and their lives sorted out. Finally last year I decided I want to work as a law clerk/paralegal. My family was disappointed in me. They couldn’t understand why I would want to be “just” a clerk when I could be a lawyer. Perhaps someday in the future I would change my mind but for now I was happy with my decision. Luckily for me, I was able to get into a program last September.  I would be starting my last year after summer ended and I couldn’t be happier. 

Even luckier for me was the fact that the girl that Tara and Chelsea were sharing the apartment with was dropping out of school (lucky for me, not so much her) so they needed a new roommate. Aside from the few months I lived with my friends who were married, I had lived at home. I was scared I was missing out on the college experience though so my parents agreed to help me with my rent while I was in school. I think they were just happy I wasn’t planning on staying at Chester’s for ever.

Tara and Chelsea each had one year left on their programs as well, although theirs were 4 years in total but they had started before me. Tara was taking human resources and Chelsea was taking marketing. With the three of us in school it could sometimes get hectic and stressful, especially around exam time but it was a blast living with them.

On Sunday night, I hadn’t wanted to come across as too eager with Brandon so I quickly sent him a text saying I just got off work and was going to bed. However since Monday morning, we had been texting non-stop. I was scared he was going to get in trouble at work for being on the phone so much, but when I mentioned it to him, he laughed. 

Brandon: Did you ever look at the business card I gave you Alya?

I replied that I hadn’t and went to find the clutch that I had used on Saturday, and fished the card out. On the front was the letter SPR embossed with some graphic behind it and through the middle was blank line stating “Sullivan Public Relations”. In the corner it had his name, with the word “Owner” under it.

What the hell? This guy owned his own company? How did I not know that? How old was this guy? I suddenly realized there was a lot more I didn’t know, than what I did. I picked up my phone and texted back.

Alya: What? You have your own company? How did I not know this?

Brandon: I guess it never came up. I don’t know where you work either.

So this guy owned his own company? I wasn’t going to tell him I was a bartender! I know it’s nothing to be ashamed of but still! I quickly changed the subject.

Alya: Umm so awkward but how old are you exactly?

Brandon: 29…is that a problem?

I swallowed. No wonder Brandon seemed so much older than the normal crowd I hung out with. I guess this explained why he had such a nice condo. I was only 22, turning 23 in September. 

Alya: Umm well I guess it depends on if you have an issue with me being 22

Brandon: What guy in his right mind wouldn’t enjoy a hot younger babe on his arm?

Finally right as we were saying good night he asked me again when he could see me. I had to work on Wednesday and then I promised my brother I’d baby sit on Thursday. We decided on drinks Friday night.

Wednesday night I ended up getting off of work a bit early. Because I am still training behind the bar, and it was so slow, the manager decided there was no need for me to hang around. Normally I hate losing any hours but soon I would be working full time for the summer and hopefully pulling a lot more tips working behind the bar so money wouldn’t be an issue.

As I walked in the apartment, Chelsea yelled “OMG Alya!! I have sooo much to tell you. You aren’t going to believe this!” Now had that come from Tara I would have taken my time to change and wash my face because everything was a big deal to Tara. She wasn’t really overly dramatic but she just couldn’t keep anything in. However, when Chelsea says it’s big you better be prepared.

“So” she started, “you know when we were at the bar the other night and you whispered to me that you didn’t know why Peter was acting so horrible? Well even more so than he has before, I mean. I found out why!!”

“Ok…” I responded, not really sure what she was going to say and to be honest not really sure I even cared. Sure the breakup hurt me but his actions the other night just pissed me off. He broke up with me, so why was he attacking me. Still, I am just human so I was slightly curious.

“I ran into Mike at Starbucks this afternoon and I went off on him, telling him he needed to tell Peter to stay the hell away from you. Mike agreed that Peter coming at you was so wrong but that he likely did it because he was so embarrassed.” Chelsea continued. Mike is one of Peter’s best friends, one who I actually thought was a decent guy, however I had no plans on us remaining friends now.

“Uh, who cares? Peter is embarrassed because the girl who he dumped was out and talking to another guy and not home crying over him? Wahhhh too bad” I rolled my eyes. 

“No!!” Chelsea smiled, I asked Mike to explain and he filled me in. Peter was embarrassed because apparently the whole reason he dumped you was because some hot chick was paying attention to him a few weeks ago at some gaming convention. She was all dressed up in some costume and all the guys were lusting over her. I guess he had one of those ‘the grass is greener’ on the other side moments and he figured if he was single that he had a chance with her.”

“So essentially he dumped me for a chick who’s hot? Yeah sorry but this isn’t making me feel better, Chels.” I slumped into the chair with my insecurities surfacing.

“My story isn’t done Alya!” Chelsea raised her eyebrows at me. “Shall I continue?”

“Sure” I muttered, wondering why one of my best friends was so excited while dragging me down.

“Well apparently, Peter added this girl to facebook and has been posting all these things on her wall and they have been flirting back and forth. So early Saturday afternoon Peter decided to drive to whatever town the convention was in next—sorry I forget where they said.” Chelsea started naming off different places, frowning as she said each one.

“CHELSEA!! Would you just finish this so I can try and understand why you are telling me in the first place!” I demanded. 

Chelsea paused, then grinned. “Apparently this gamer chick flirts with everyone. It a part of her job. The whole facebook page is her persona not her personal page. Peter showed up with flowers and asked her out.  She told him she wasn’t interested but he persisted. He told her he dumped his girlfriend and would love nothing more than to take her out. I guess she looked at him and laughed right in his face. She told him he was an idiot and to stop playing games and grow up. Best of all….all this happened in front of a huge crowd. I guess he was pretty embarrassed. He tried to play it off like it was just a dare and he knew she was only a character. Everyone could see through him though, so he left as soon as he could.”

I took a moment to take that all in. First I was hurt and upset that he could throw away two years just based on some random chick giving him attention. Then I realized how much of a joke our relationship must have become. How he pretended he was some God and he was trying to let me down easily, saying he didn’t love me anymore. Ha! The whole time it was just a ploy to get out of our relationship so he could bang some gaming bimbo.

I suddenly smiled as I shook my head and realized just what a favour he had done for me. Now I was truly free without any lingering doubts.

“Apparently Peter saw our facebook pictures, tagging us at the bar that night. He told everyone he was going to go win you back. That you would come running back to him and that he was only playing with the other chick” Chelsea repeated.

“Well” I cackled “Let the games begin. Oh wait, it’s already game over for Peter and he lost! The wanna be player got played.”

Red Seems To Be My Colour Lately

Around 4 am I decided it was time for me to head home. I figured if I thought leaving in the middle of the night was awkward, that the morning would only be worse. Brandon had fallen asleep so I had my chance. I quickly gathered my clothes and got dressed in the hall. As soon as I made my way to the lobby, I called for an Uber.

When I arrived back at my house, I was happy to see all the lights off. I knew the girls were going to be demanding details but I needed to sleep first. I opened the door and let myself in, trying as hard as I could to be quiet. I slipped off my shoes and started slowly walking towards my bedroom, praying I didn't run into anything. Just as I went to open my door, I heard a mans voice say "Freeze! Where do you think you're going?"

I gasped and dropped my shoes, making a huge clatter. My heart was ready to jump out of my throat. I couldn't decide if I should scream or try and get inside my room and slam the door shut. Suddenly, I heard a deep laugh coming from behind me.

Ryan!! Son of a bitch! I turned around and glared at the guy sprawled out on my sofa, who was currently smirking at me. Ryan is Tara's cousin and one of my best male friends. As he still lives at home, he often crashes at our place on the weekend after a night out.

"So, little Miss Alya is doing the walk of shame" he teased. "Not a sight I thought I would see tonight! Your two darling roommates convinced me you were in your bed fast asleep. Here you were out doing who knows what. Or should I say, doing who knows who?"he asked with his eyebrow raised.

With anyone else this may have bothered me but Ryan and I talked about everything. He knew my character inside out. I made my way over to sofa, pretending to walk by but then quickly dropped myself on top of him.

"Oooofff" he groaned. "Get off me! Don't make me tickle you!" Normally I'd take the challenge but Ryan knows I hate being tickled and will scream bloody murder. Not wanting to talk about my night with the girls I decided instead to cuddle up beside Ryan. He hugged me in his arms and I laid my head on his chest. If anyone were to walk in they would assume it was Ryan who I spent the night with but everyone knew we were just friends. Besides, the odd time things ever did shift towards the romantic side with us, Tara was right there to jump in. As she was an only child, Ryan was like a brother to her and she wasn't going to risk something happening between us and then going bad.

I told Ryan about my night, obviously leaving out some of the details. Trying to be my protector as always he gave me a lecture about going home with a guy I just met. He grilled me for details on Brandon, and when I told him I really didn't know much about him, Ryan started to bitch at me again.

"Ryan" I exclaimed, "just drop it! I've felt like shit for weeks now and suddenly I don't feel quite so discarded or ugly"

"God damn it Alya!" he roared, then lowered his voice. "You are not ugly or anything of the sort. Peter was a fucking wanker. I would continue this conversation but I'm a little drunk and I don't want to say something I shouldn't"

I wasn't quite sure what he meant but I was tired and needed my bed. As I hugged him good night, and kissed him on this cheek, he looked up at me and grinned. "I will say I wish I had been there to see that jerk in pain."

I laughed, "yeah Brandon hit him pretty good!"

Ryan laughed, as he turned over onto his stomach. As he did that he smirked, "I meant when Chelsea made him scream!"
....................................................................

The next morning at 10:30 my alarm started going off. I hit snooze and tried to figure out why it was even going off. Suddenly I remembered that I had to be at work for 12. I groaned. The last thing I felt like doing was working a 10 hour shift. The only good thing was that I wasn't going to need to fill the girls in about last night. As I went to get out of bed some of my muscles reminded me of the previous night and I blushed.

I quickly showered and got ready. I tried to peek out my room to see if I could make a clean break. Unfortunately, Tara, Chelsea and Ryan were all sitting in the living room and saw me. I quickly yelled " No time to talk!! Going to be late" and ran out the door.

For the past three years I have worked as a waitress at a local restaurant called Chester's. The best way I can describe it is an upscale sports bar. We serve pretty good food and drinks, and are always showing various sporting events. Being a waitress there paid pretty well with tips especially when the home team was winning. Unfortunately it also meant with putting up with a lot of idiots and drunken ass holes. I had been slowly training to work as a bartender. I had enough of working the floor. Luck was in my favour tonight though as I was getting to work being the bar for the first time.

I looked at the schedule to see who would be training me. My heart started beating a little faster when I realised it was Liam. He had just moved here and started working working with us about 2 months ago. And he was HOT. He wasn't overly tall, but he had a great body and the most amazing arms. Nothing massive but they just looked impressive. He also had the most beautiful blue eyes that lit up when he smiled. Sadly Liam didn't seem to smile a lot but his broody, serious personality seemed to make him even hotter. This would be our first time really spending any time together. This night as looking up.

I clocked in and made my way to the bar. Liam finished up the drinks he was making and then turned to me. "Hey Alya! Looks like you are stuck with me tonight" he said.

"I'd like to be!" I stated, then blushed as I realised what I said. "Umm I mean I'd like that. Err I mean, that's good" Jesus why couldn't I shut up. I just stared at him and realised I was making it worse by not saying anything. Luckily, Stacy, one of the waitresses on duty came and placed an order. As Liam made the drinks, Stacy came over to  me and grinned. "Lucky you!" she exclaimed. "I'd love a little one on one time with Liam, if you know what I mean!!"

I started to turn red and prayed he never heard her. I don't think he did actually hear our conversation but sadly an older lady sitting at the bar did. She wolf whistled at Liam and purred "I wish it was me spending some time with that hunk!"

I wanted to crawl into a hole. Why is my whole life based on embarrassment lately? Thank goodness, after that little incident the rest of the night calmed down. Normally Sunday nights are pretty busy  when events are going on but there were no major games today and the weather was decent so everyone was out enjoying it. Liam showed me the basics and half way through the night he let me start making the orders. A few times I caught him looking at me but I just brushed it off as him making sure I did a good job.

When my shift was finally over, I clocked off, grabbed my stuff and waved to everyone as I left. I checked my phone and saw several missed messages. Three were from Peter, bitching over last night, calling me names and the last one asking me to call him. I deleted those in a hurry.

I had a few other texts from a few random friends, one from Chelsea asking when I was off and one from my brother asking if I could baby sit my nephew on Thursday. Disappointment filled me when I saw nothing from Brandon. I know that I will likely never hear from him again. I do know what a one night stand is. But suddenly it just made me feel bad about myself all over again. I realised how stupid I'm being. Peter dumping me and Brandon not texting are two different things, but in some shitty way they were making me feel the same.

I pulled out of the parking lot and started making my way home, with a slight detour to Burger King through the drive through - Opps! I'm not even sorry though. My chicken sandwich was awesome. As I got out of the car, I noticed I had a missed message that must have just came through.

Brandon - So Alya. I really enjoyed last night. When do I get to see you again?

A huge smile came over my face and I did a little dance. Perhaps things weren't as shitty as I thought